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Wedding speeches - the funny business

Any speech, be it eulogy, corporate communication, leaving party or burial of  your pet goldfish, is all the better for humour. The humour in any speech gives it balance, helps to break it up, and in many cases makes it bearable. The lack of it, is why so many lectures and business comms are the equivalent of having a dirty great tranquilliser dart blown into your backside. Wedding speeches require just as much humour as you can possible cram, in - not dodgy wedding gags, but genuinely funny lines, memories and observations. 

The most dangerous type of wedding speaker is the one that thinks they've turned into a stand up comedian for the day, however, you can be funny and doing it in an understated way, is by far the best policy, and that brings me to the subject of ice breakers and internet gags. I have covered these before, but was recently sent a speech that was a like a who's who of the world's worst wedding gags.

If you think that your best man speech is so lacking you have to resort to the 'two weeks in Wales - Bangor' joke, then you're in deep trouble - if you don't know it, Google it at your peril. It's desperately unfunny and crass , and will only serve one purpose: to make you look like an idiot. let's not forget the equally horrendous idea of starting your best man speech with 'I'm finally glad the groom has decided I am the best man...' get it? Yep, at best it's incredibly weak, and at worst looks horribly self centred. Then there's the one about 'if I do a good job today, the groom says I can definitely be best man at his next wedding'...I mean, where do you start with that? It's just awful. Of course we have...

'And Gentlemen I think you will  all agree with me that it’s a sad day for single men everywhere as another beauty leaves the available list .....and ladies I’ll think you’ll agree that today will pass without much of of a ripple.....' Ha Ha, bloody ha. Where is the funny bit?


The speech I read had all these and more, which meant not only was it creaking under the weight of crap gags, there isn't much room for the stuff that really counts. Forget the 'classic' internet gags, and find the funny closer to reality.

Written By
Adrian Simpson
17 Oct, 2021

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