Wedding Speech Order
By Adrian Simpson · 1 February 2022 Order
If you are the first speaker up, then your speech has to include welcomes and acknowledgements. So, if a groom is on pole position, then a father of the bride doesn’t need repeat the process.
It makes very little sense to have the best man speech first. As first speaker you thank everyone and welcome them to the wedding. Chances are he’s had little or zero input into the big day, and so is completely the wrong choice to start the proceedings.
Length
The more speakers you have, the shorter everyone’s speech have to be. This advice is crucial, and if it’s not followed, the whole thing can unravel into hours of your guests’ lives they’ll never get back. The groom has to run this part, and ensure that speakers are kept to within a set time frame.
Coordination
Each speaker has to know who is going before them, and who follows. Without that information it’s impossible to judge how to pitch your speech. For instance, if the best man is following a bridesmaid, he needs to acknowledge her, hopefully in a fun way, and also ensure that his speech is the ying to her yang. Find out what she’s covering, and then select a different path; the last thing you want as a best man is to hear your material being aired before you stand up.
Toasts
There should only ever be a maximom of 4 toasts:
- To those no longer with us
- To the parents
- To the bridesmaids
- To your wife and the future
You should never double up on toasts, it saps guests’ patience, and can feel very awkward, however, unless you’re all communicating, this can happen far too easily. The only toast that should traditionally be made by the groom, is to the bridesmaids, but it also makes sense of him to cover the parents, and of course his bride. I tend to give the father of the bride the toast to those no longer with us.