best man speech examples

We all want to know how others did it, so we can either replicate their triumph, and steal their funny one liners, or hopefully avoid the way they crashed and burned. Here I’ve posted some great examples from all the different parts of various speeches, as well as some great examples of what not to write.

The Introduction

You can see from these examples that a good introduction just needs to be simple and straightforward, and if you can get something funny in there, even better! The last one is quite punchy, at the client’s request but if you think that would work for your guests, then it’s your call.

Intro 1

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, for those who of you I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting yet, my name is Chris and I am officially Paul’s second best man…second best ladies and gentlemen…nobody likes to be second best do they? Well, Paul, the once great Thespian should know better than most…anyway where were we?

Intro 2

Good evening ladies and gentlemen before I begin I’d just like to introduce myself: my name is Chris and it is my very great honour and privilege to be the first of Mark’s two Best Man…we had to split it…46 years is quite a long time to cover all in one go! Over the course of the next few minutes I’ll be taking you through Mark’s sporting heroics, dealing with incredible loss and being caned by people dressed as nuns…which in fact had nothing to do with the stag do.

intro 3

Good evening Ladies and Gentlemen, over the next few minutes we’ll be talking about the man for whom Scottish Independence now means asking his English wife if he can go to the pub at the weekend. I can’t help but thinking that an English woman telling a Scottish man he can’t go to the pub, would be a new low in this country’s rich cultural history.

intro 4

Let’s be honest, Brent is a great guy and everything, and Cassie is wonderful lady but we shouldn’t kid ourselves here, there’s another big draw, something or more correctly, someone that makes this an extra special occasion. This is a celebration of wedded bliss and to have the stamp of approval from one of the biggest names in radio makes it all the more special. What can I say? Last week my listener figures went into double figures. The week before the studio phone actually rang twice. I’m living the dream, and you ladies and gentlemen are now part of that dream. Remember this face

AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT NOT TO DO….

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen, before I begin I would just like to take this opportunity to introduce myself to those of you I haven’t yet met. My name is Dave, and this Bob, and together it is our very great pleasure and privilege to be Colin’s best men for today’s celebrations.

At this point I thought I would be nervous at doing Leigh’s speech but I am now looking forward to ripping him a new arse hole in front of all his family and friends and better yet he has to sit there quietly.

THE ESTABLISHER

This is the part after the introduction where you’re setting the scene for the speech and teeing up who the groom is and summarising what makes him…him.

establisher 1

Over the next few minutes I will be guiding you though what amounts to one great big cry for help: Paul’s life. The inglorious acting career, the ridiculous hair, owning a ridiculous car, the persistent alcoholic over indulgence and drunken profane outbursts – he was quite simply South West London’s answer to David Hasselhof…just not as successful.

establisher 2

Neil is a special friend and special friends deserve one thing: three stag dos. The weekends of Istanbul, London and Leeds will live long in the memory of not just those who went, but also those who read about us in the national papers. The mass chants of ‘feed the snake! Feed the snake!’ and the enduring company of our new best friend Bianca the stripper are, I have to say, completely unrelated. I would also like to say that for the record Brian accepts and welcomes people from every country around the globe. Almost.

AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT NOT TO DO….

Below is a classic example of how wrong people can get things if they’re not properly switched on to what works and what doesn’t. The first problem is it’s not funny, the first ‘gag’ is used at thousands of weddings very single week, and is awful. Secondly forget the bridesmaids they’ve just been toasted in the Groom’s Speech, the hair gag is weak, and never use the word ‘today’ when talking about the bride’s beauty.

Now a wise man once told me the best man speech should last as long as it takes for the groom to make love.. So thank you everyone for coming

Firstly I would just like to say how beautiful the brides maids look who have only been out shone by the bride herself, who looks amazing today.

If everyone could be upstanding, and raise a glass, know as some of you may know Kerry wanted to have the wedding a lot earlier than this, so that a certain something could be involved in the wedding, and unfortunately after a long and hard fight that couldn’t happen. I am of course talking about mikes rapidly thinning hairline, you will be sadly missed.

your connection

My first mistake was going to stay in the shared house in London where he lived. My second was to comment on the hair. As a glass bowl of pot pourri went sailing past my head and smashed behind me giving off a wonderful burst of sandalwood fragrance, I was given enough time to realize that this was a troubled, sensitive character who didn’t take criticism that well. Perfect friend material.

Example 1

My first mistake was going to stay in the shared house in London where he lived. My second was to comment on the hair. As a glass bowl of pot pourri went sailing past my head and smashed behind me giving off a wonderful burst of sandalwood fragrance, I was given enough time to realize that this was a troubled, sensitive character who didn’t take criticism that well. Perfect friend material.

example 2

I first properly met Nick way back in 1994 when we started secondary school together. Little did we know it at the time but it was the start of a beautiful relationship, which, for me, EVENTUALLY proved worth pursuing years later when I was able to borrow all his notes and pass my A Levels. Of course, Nick didn’t need them because he might look quite cool now but he was in fact a complete square at school.  The day when he could read without putting his finger on the word and then count without using his hands, were both real breakthrough moments in his life, only to be capped a few weeks later when he passed his driving test.

THE TRICKY MIDDLE BIT

Everyone loves a good story, just as long as it’s not in a Best Man Speech, so working out how to use the stories you’ve got in the most effective way is crucial. Here are some examples where the stories have been condensed for extra punch. As you can see form the examples below the detail has bee stripped out and they’ve been used to make an observation about the groom. This is exactly the kind of length you’re looking for whilst nailing at least 2 stories/points.

Example 1

Now as he embarked on adult life Nick was to learn the hard way just what it is to be a man, and the number one rule is: if you are going to offer to buy the drinks in happy hour, it’s best not to drop the entire lot down yourself as you get back to the table thus meaning you have to go and buy it all again just after happy hour’s finished. Also you should only ever do a runner from a restaurant via the roof if you HAVEN’T actually paid the bill. Leaving Prezzo’s this way one evening after settling up and leaving a good tip, still doesn’t make any sense to anyone.

example 2

Anyway when Mark wasn’t failing to hit the top spot in the classroom he was also finding it difficult to do that on the sports field as well. However, with a modest talent and even less interest, he did the only sensible thing to do: saved up all his skill and enthusiasm for one split second of genius. Quite how he managed to catch the impossible cricket ball as it left our sports master’s bat, is still completely unknown. But with, uncharacteristic razor sharp reactions and gazelle like agility, he did just that, and won his side the match. Literally seconds after this Mark retired from all forms of competitive sport – at the very top of his game.

AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT NOT TO DO….

Below the Best Man has attempted to abbreviate the story quite forgetting that it’s still supposed to make people laugh. Not only has he stripped out all the detail but he’s also stripped out the funny. Instead I would have used that jumping in the puddle as some sort of cry for help railing against the fat he was ginger and single…you get the idea..

Is it because of his intelligence, as we all know that he is always right and won't take advice from anyone else, he will always eventually prove himself wrong, like when my father, mikes uncle told him not to jump in what seemed to be a fairly small puddle, a puddle that mike thought wouldn’t go above his boots. So naturally being right he jumped into the puddle, which to Mike's surprise went up to his neck.

 

THE FINALE

This should be super straightforward and you don’t have to go overboard on emotion of that’s not your thing – some guys are a lot more comfortable with it, some aren’t. Below is a perfect ending that can be used for all scenarios.

ENDING

Seriously when Mark met you Emily, everyone could see just how happy that made him. He’s always been a great bloke waiting for the right girl and everyone who knows you both will tell you just what a great couple you are together. Mark I couldn’t be happier for you today, we’ve known each other such a long time and I hope that friendship lasts for many more years to come.

I’d like to wish you all the very best for the future and all the luck in the world.

Ladies and gentlemen, the bride and groom!